Chapter 12 is all on Commitment. These quotes give further insight into what commitment is, and provides reflective questions on how we can develop commitment in our relationships.
1.
Commitment is persevering,
unwavering devotion that even death itself cannot sway, a loyal determination
to fulfill what one has promised, an ever-present “weness” that sustains a
union through the years.
2.
Commitment is both the pledge
and the proof of love.
3.
I believe that the heart of
commitment is an abiding spirit of belonging to each other.
4.
It is the feeling that, no
matter where you are, you are at home with this partner. “I belong to you and
you belong to me”.
5.
Commitment is inherent in love,
and love is at the core of commitment.
6.
Commitment has this ideal
thread of someone driven by desire and devotion.
7.
If we are realistic, the fiber
of commitment is not only woven from the strand of “I want to,” but also has
the intertwining strand of “I have to.”
8.
Obligation, responsibility, and
dedication demand perseverance when a commitment has been made. Regardless of
your obstacles, genuine commitment presses on.
9.
Making sense of commitment is
enormously challenging as your relationship becomes more complex.
10. The first strand of commitment is made from passion, devotion, and
resoluteness.
11. (Commitment) prompts personal sacrifices for the good of your
partner. It holds your partner close to you even when you are apart and
elevates his or her importance when you are together.
12. It is this aspect of commitment that also generates an identity in
being a couple, not just individuals.
13. Be careful you don’t convince yourself with some rationalization
that justifies your partner’s lack of commitment to others and assumes that you
are in a different class from them.
14. A commitment will only be as strong as the conscience that upholds
it.
15. For most, commitment is the want-to and the have-to.
16. As you invest time and experiences in your relationship with your
partner, it is as though you sew more stitches with this thread of commitment.
17. The more meaningful your experiences, the deeper your talks, the wider
your circle of friends and family, and the longer your spend together all
become threads joining your lives together.
18. The same force of commitment can also cause you to compromise what
you want in a relationship so you don’t lose what you’ve got.
19. There is an old saying about sewing, “ A stitch in time save nine.”
This saying means that if there is a tear in the fabric that requires one
stitch, take care of it immediately or it will grow and end up requiring nine.
So for you and your partner, pay attention to the fabric of your relationship
and deal wit problems immediately.
20. The last strand in the bond of commitment is the have-to component
and refers to the beliefs of responsibility and obligation that you or your
partner associates with everything from your first meeting to marriage.
